My Top Ten: The Catch-Up

I have been reading a book-big surprise to everyone-in which the main character talked about thinking of someone as a "product" that she had to market, not a person but a product, person=product and it made me think-isn't that what we do with our families, our husbands, our children, ourselves? (I am feeling rather sarcastic and sassy today.)

Okay to be honest, I started this post on Monday and I then subsequently just left it sitting up on my computer until I could come back and finish it and now it is Thursday.  I have had countless interruptions, many butts and noses to wipe, meals to make, laundry to fold and an anxiety attack to avert.  So in the spirit of scatterbrained randomness I am treating you all to a lovely sprinkling of the thoughts that have been vibrating and banging around in my head.  (I will return to the marketing theme another time.)

Here goes the round-up!

1.  I am reading lots of things right now, in fact I am actively reading 5 different books but at this very moment there is one that has captured my heart: bittersweet: thoughts on change, grace and learning the hard way, by Shauna Niequist.  It is a collection of  personal essays and it speaks into my very soul.  Right now I am ruminating on the one called: things i don't do.  It is about deciding what you want your life to be about.  Shauna had lunch with a older friend of hers, Denise, here is what Denise told her: "...it's not hard to decide what you want your life to be about.  What's hard (she said,) is figuring out what you are willing to give up in order to do the things that you really care about."  Oh my gosh!  We always worry about doing everything, everything that everybody else is doing...keeping up with the Jones's everything, never really stopping and evaluating what it is we really want our lives to be about and how to accomplish that.  As I am traveling down this path right now I have to figure out where to build my alters (thank you Anne Graham Lotz), what I REALLY want my live to be about and what I am willing to give up because if I don't the everything(s) that I do do are going to take over and minimize what I am about and who God wants me to be.  I don't want my tomb stone to say "she did everything and none of it mattered".  I want my life and the things in it to matter!  I am here to do something great, even if I don't know what it is yet, I know that there is more to life than doing everything.  As Shauna says, "do everything better" is a "super-charged triple threat, capturing in three words the mania of modern life, the anti-spirit, anti-spiritual, soul shriveling garbage that infects and compromises our lives." I don't want my life to be one big compromise!

2.  POOP! My life is all about poop! The past few days I have been woken up to Reese calling me from the bathroom, "MOM, I'm done.  I went poop and pee."  I don't want to wipe somebody's nasty poop butt first thing in the morning.  It has been the first thing I do when I get out of bed at 7am (okay, 8am-I am mother of the year as I sleep for an extra hour while my 3 Stooges sit downstairs rotting their brains in front of PBS Kids).  Really, really?  GROSS! There was no disclaimer when I became a mom that said you will wipe butts clean of poop all the time!  There really should have been.  On a positive poop note, Finn is pooping on the potty and that is infinitely better then cleaning/wiping a poopy diaper butt!  Plus, it is so cute when he says "All done, MOM!"

3.  I am scared down to my very core and fiber of my being about the fact that we are truly and honestly considering me staying home full-time (as if my 10 hour a week part-time job makes me less of a full-time mom).  It is anxiety-attack making.  My blood runs hot and I can feel it rushing through my veins.  I am scared of what God is asking me to give up: built-in freedom and my outside source of validation of being a productive member of society (and of course the small amount of money that I make). I know in my head and my heart that His promises are faithful and that His pin-pricks at my heart are what I need to be listening to and following, but, yes I said but, I am so scared.  I am lost in the forest of being scared when I just need to BELIEVE in my heart that His path is where I need to be.  Help me believe Lord, I am scared, I am afraid, please carry me.

4.  Dinner....HELP!!!

5.  I am loving, absolutely loving, listening to Audrey Assad's album The House You're Building.  It is like a huge hug that squeezes my heart.

6.  Mario Brothers for Wii!  I love (okay really loathe) playing this 2-player with my husband!  It is so funny to watch him get so mad at the game that he stands up to finish a level because he thinks is might actually help him to get to the end!  Oh, I love to watch him get mad at something so ridiculously silly!  The kids love to watch us play and Finn calls it "the brothers, play the brothers."

7.  Dear Mr. Groundhog,
     As groundhog's day is upon us I would respectfully like to ask that you not see your shadow.  As much as I like winter and how beautiful it is when the world around me looks like a snow globe I am desperate to get into my gardens and feel the earth on my fingers.  My children are longing to be outside and run around like crazy people through the sprinkler.  I wish for a ring around the bathtub to clean.  So, Mr. Groundhog I again beseech you, please don't see your shadow.

Yours kindly,
Shannon

8.  My sister and her husband are moving here next week!!!!!! I am so excited!  My heart leaps for joy and screams in utter excitement!  You have no idea how excited I am Emily!  We are so planting that garden together this summer!!!

9.  I love the fact that my best friend is going to meet her son for the very first time in 18 days!  I so wish that I could be there to see her and her husband cry and hug and kiss this incredibly special and sweet little boy of theirs.  Oh Joshua, they can't get you home fast enough!

10.  I have visitors for the next 3 weekends!  My mom and dad this weekend, my brother next weekend and my mother and father-in-law the following weekend!  The efficiency suite is ready, complete with a kitchen and grill for any of your culinary needs!  Little Tikes really does think of everything.  I am excited for my kids, who love to have sleepovers in each other's rooms with their grandparents and aunts and uncles!  They live for these visits!

Okay, 10 things is enough and if you read them all, THANK YOU!  Now I must go shower, start laundry and referee my children!